Rufus T. Firefly: [locked in a bathroom] Let me out of here! Hey, let me out of here or throw me a magazine!


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: [on the phone] Get me headquarters. Not hindquarters, headquarters!


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: [singing] If any form of pleasure is exhibited, report to me and it will be prohibited! I'll put my foot down, so shall it be... this is the land of the free! The last man nearly ruined this place he didn't know what to do with it. If you think this country's bad off now, just wait till I get through with it! The country's taxes must be fixed, and I know what to do with it. If you think you're paying too much now, just wait till I get through with it!


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: [to Chicolini] Come on up here, I wanna scare the cabinet.


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: [to Chicolini] I wanted to get a writ of habeas corpus, but I should have gotten a-rid of you instead.


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: And now, members of the cabinet...
[pounds gavel]
Rufus T. Firefly: we'll take up old business.
Cabinet Member: I wish to discuss the tariff.
Rufus T. Firefly: Sit down, that's new business. No old business? Very well...
[pounds gavel]
Rufus T. Firefly: we'll take up new business.
Cabinet Member: Now, about that tariff...
Rufus T. Firefly: Too late, that's old business already. Sit down.


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: Chicolini, give me a number from one to ten.
Chicolini: Eleven.
Rufus T. Firefly: Right


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: Chicolini, I need you badly right now. What'll you take to come back and work for me again?
Chicolini: I'll take a vacation.
Rufus T. Firefly: Good, you're hired.


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: Dig trenches, with our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready made. Here, run out and get some trenches. Wait a minute, get 'em this high...
[gestures to his chin]
Rufus T. Firefly: and our soldiers won't need any pants. Wait a minute, get 'em this high...
[gestures over his head]
Rufus T. Firefly: and we won't need any soldiers!


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: Don't look now, but there's one man too many in this room, and I think it's you.


--Groucho Marx (as Rufus T. Firefly) in Duck Soup