[at the booking office, trying to be hired]
Joe: What kind of a band is this, anyway?
Sig Poliakoff: You gotta be under twenty-five.
Jerry: We could pass for that.
Sig Poliakoff: You gotta be blonde.
Jerry: We could dye our hair.
Sig Poliakoff: And you gotta be girls.
Jerry: We could...
Joe: No, we couldn't!

Alberto Beddini: I promised my dresses that I would take them to Venice and that you would be in them!

Daphne: [after meeting Sugar] How about the shape of that liquor cabinet?

Sugar: This is my friend Daphne, she's a Vassar girl.
Daphne: I'm a what?
Sugar: Or was it Bryn Mawr?
Junior (Joe): [firmly to Jerry] I heard a very sad story about a girl that went to Bryn Mawr. She squealed on her roommate... and they found her strangled with her own brazier!
Daphne: Yes, we've got to be very careful who we choose for a roommate.

Professor Henry Higgins: You might marry, you know. You see, Eliza, all men are not confirmed old bachelors like myself and the Colonel. Most men are the marrying sort, poor devils. And you're not bad-looking; you're really quite a pleasure to look at sometimes. Not now, of course, when you've been crying, you look like the very devil; but when you're all right, and quite yourself, you're what I would call... attractive.