Phil Harris: Going somewhere?
Jack Benny: Listen, Phil, there's a train leaving for the east tonight. I'm going to be on it if I have to sit on the engineer's lap.
Phil Harris: Well, we just got here. You know what Brenda said... this place grows on you.
Jack Benny: Well, it'll have to grow on somebody else!


--Jack Benny (as Jack Benny) in Buck Benny Rides Again

Ted Nash: Bob, you're shaking like a leaf.
Bob Temple: Shaking like a leaf! What's a leaf got to shake about?


--Jack Benny (as ) in Man About Town

[Jack is soaked]
Rochester: Is it rainin' outside?
Jack Benny: No, Rochester, I was eating a grapefruit and it got out of control.


--Jack Benny (as Jack Benny) in Buck Benny Rides Again

[repeated line]
Joseph Tura: [disguised as Colonel Ehrhardt] So they call me Concentration Camp Ehrhardt?


--Jack Benny (as Joseph Tura) in To Be or Not to Be

Babbs Babberley: Say, I wonder if he can sue me for breach of promise.


--Jack Benny (as Babbs Babberley) in Charley's Aunt (1941)