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James Garner

James Garner
(as Lt. Cmdr. Charles Edward Madison)

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: I don't want to know what's good, or bad, or true. I let God worry about the truth. I just want to know the momentary fact about things. Life isn't good, or bad, or true. It's merely factual, it's sensual, it's alive. My idea of living sensual facts are you, a home, a country, a world, a universe. In that order. I want to know what I am, not what I should be.

James Garner

James Garner
(as Lt. Cmdr. Charles Edward Madison)

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: I want you to remember that the last time you saw me, I was unregenerately eating a Hershey bar.

James Garner

James Garner
(as Lt. Cmdr. Charles Edward Madison)

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: I'm not sentimental about war. I see nothing noble in widows.

James Garner

James Garner
(as Lt. Cmdr. Charles Edward Madison)

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: No one gets moral unless they're trying to get something or get out of something.

James Garner

James Garner
(as Lt. Cmdr. Charles Edward Madison)

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: War isn't hell at all. It's man at his best; the highest morality he's capable of. It's not war that's insane, you see. It's the morality of it. It's not greed or ambition that makes war: it's goodness. Wars are always fought for the best of reasons: for liberation or manifest destiny. Always against tyranny and always in the interest of humanity. So far this war, we've managed to butcher some ten million humans in the interest of humanity. Next war it seems we'll have to destroy all of man in order to preserve his damn dignity. It's not war that's unnatural to us, it's virtue. As long as valor remains a virtue, we shall have soldiers. So, I preach cowardice. Through cowardice, we shall all be saved.


James Garner

James Garner
(as Lt. Cmdr. Charles Edward Madison)

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: You American haters bore me to tears, Ms. Barham. I've dealt with Europeans all my life. I know all about us parvenus from the States who come over here and race around your old Cathedral towns with our cameras and Coca-cola bottles... Brawl in your pubs, paw at your women, and act like we own the world. We over-tip, we talk too loud, we think we can buy anything with a Hershey bar. I've had Germans and Italians tell me how politically ingenuous we are, and perhaps so. But we haven't managed a Hitler or a Mussolini yet. I've had Frenchmen call me a savage because I only took half an hour for lunch. Hell, Ms. Barham, the only reason the French take two hours for lunch is because the service in their restaurants is lousy. The most tedious lot are you British. We crass Americans didn't introduce war into your little island. This war, Ms. Barham to which we Americans are so insensitive, is the result of 2,000 years of European greed, barbarism, superstition, and stupidity. Don't blame it on our Coca-cola bottles. Europe was a going brothel long before we came to town.

James Garner

James Garner
(as Lt. Cmdr. Charles Edward Madison)

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: You know, I never realized what a sensual satisfaction grieving is for women.

Julie Andrews

Julie Andrews
(as Emily Barham)

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: You're forever falling for men on their last nights on furlough. That's about the limit of your commitments, one night, a day, a month. You prefer lovers to husbands, hotels to homes. You'd rather grieve than live.
Emily Barham: You're not only cowardly and selfish; you're remarkably cruel as well.

James Garner

James Garner
(as Lt. Cmdr. Charles Edward Madison)

Emily Barham: I believe in honor, service, courage, and fair play, and cricket, and all the other symbols of British character. Which have only civilized half the world!
Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: You British plundered half the world for your own profit, let's not pass it off as the age of enlightenment.

Julie Andrews

Julie Andrews
(as Emily Barham)

Emily Barham: I don't want any more doomed men.

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