Hildy Johnson: Walter, you're wonderful, in a loathsome sort of way.

Hildy Johnson: Walter!
Walter Burns: What?
Hildy Johnson: The mayor's first wife, what was her name?
Walter Burns: You mean the one with the wart on her?
Hildy Johnson: Right.
Walter Burns: Fanny!

Bruce Baldwin: [Concerning Walter] I like him; he's got a lot of charm.
Hildy Johnson: Well he comes by it naturally his grandfather was a snake.

Bruce Baldwin: [Speaking of Walter] You know, Hildy, he's not such a bad fellow.
Hildy Johnson: No, he should make some girl real happy.
Bruce Baldwin: Uh-huh.
Hildy Johnson: [Under her breath] Slap-happy.
Bruce Baldwin: He's not the man for you. I can see that. But I sort of like him. He's got a lot of charm.
Hildy Johnson: Well, he comes by it naturally - his grandfather was a snake.

Bruce Baldwin: Mighty nice little town, Albany. They've got the state capitol there, you know.

Walter Burns: [ducking from Hildy's throw and reaching for the ringing telephone] Oh, you're losing your arm! You used to be able to pitch better than that.

Walter Burns: [On the phone with Duffy; Walter and Hildy are getting remarried and going to Niagara Falls on their honeymoon] What? A strike? What strike? Where? Albany? Well, I know it's on the way, Duffy, but I can't ask Hildy to...
Hildy Johnson: All right, we'll honeymoon in Albany.
Walter Burns: Okay, Duffy.
[to Hildy]
Walter Burns: Well, isn't that a coincidence, we're going to Albany! I wonder if Bruce can put us up.

Walter Burns: [on the phone] Well Butch, where are you?... Well, what are you doing there? Haven't you even started?... Listen, it's a matter of life and death!... Well, you can't stop for a dame now! I don't care if you've been after her for six years. Butch - our whole lives are at stake! Are you going to let a woman come between us after all we've been through?... Butch, I'd put my arm in fire for you, up to here. Now you can't double-cross me... Put her on, I'll talk to her.
[talking to the woman]
Walter Burns: Oh, good evening madam. Now listen, you ten-cent glamour girl. You can't keep Butch away from his duty!... What's that?... You say that again, I'll come over there and kick you in the teeth!... Say, what kind of language is that? Now look here you. -
[makes a noise like a horse, hangs up]
Walter Burns: She hung up! What did I say?

Walter Burns: Bruce, I, uh... let me get this straight. I must have misunderstood you. You mean you're taking the sleeper today and then getting married tomorrow?
Bruce Baldwin: Oh, well, it's not like that.
Walter Burns: Well, what's it like?
Hildy Johnson: Poor Walter. He'll toss and turn all night. Perhaps we better tell him Mother's coming along, too.
Walter Burns: [to Hildy] Mother? Why, your mother kicked the bucket!
Bruce Baldwin: No, my mother, my mother.
Walter Burns: Oh, your mother. Oh, well, that relieves my mind.
Hildy Johnson: [to Walter] It was cruel of us to let you suffer that way.
[to Bruce]
Hildy Johnson: Isn't Walter sweet? Always wanting to protect me.

Walter Burns: Diabetes! I ought to know better than to hire anybody with a disease.