Einar: Hail Ragnar! And hail Ragnar's beard!


--Kirk Douglas (as ) in The Vikings

Einar: I want this slave alive. The sun will cross the sky a thousand times before he dies.
[to Eric]
Einar: And you'll wish a thousand times that you were dead.


--Kirk Douglas (as ) in The Vikings

Einar: Oh, stop shouting. You sound like a moose giving birth to a hedgehog.


--Kirk Douglas (as ) in The Vikings

Einar: Take your magic elsewhere, holy man!


--Kirk Douglas (as ) in The Vikings

George Phipps: The purpose of radio writing, as far as I can see, is to prove to the masses that a deodorant can bring happiness... a mouth wash guarantee success and a laxative attract romance.


--Kirk Douglas (as George Phipps) in A Letter to Three Wives

Jim Deakins: Sure is big country. The only thing bigger is the sky.


--Kirk Douglas (as Jim Deakins) in The Big Sky

Jim Fallon: Stop thinking so hard, Frenchie. You're liable to get yourself a bad headache.


--Kirk Douglas (as ) in The Big Trees

Jonathan Shields: [to Georgia] Well, congratulations, you've got it all laid out for you so you can wallow in pity for yourself. The betrayed woman. The wounded doe with all the drivel that goes with it going through your mind right now. Oh, he doesn't love me at all. He was lying. All those lovely moments, those tender words. He's lying. He's cheap and cruel. Well, maybe I like Lilas. Maybe I like to be cheap once in a while! Maybe everyone does, or don't you remember?


--Kirk Douglas (as Jonathan Shields) in The Bad and the Beautiful

Jonathan Shields: [whistles] Gentlemen! There seems to be an honest difference of opinion.
Harry Pebbel: There is.
Jonathan Shields: It looks as though we'll have to make a compromise.
Harry Pebbel: You bet we will.
Jonathan Shields: The compromise, gentlemen, is this: Harry, shut your penny-pinching mouth and build him his platform!


--Kirk Douglas (as Jonathan Shields) in The Bad and the Beautiful

Jonathan Shields: Because he was a drunk, you're a drunk. Because he loved women, you're a tramp. But you forget one thing: he did it with style.


--Kirk Douglas (as Jonathan Shields) in The Bad and the Beautiful