Woody Allen
(as Victor)
Michael James:
Did you find a job?
Victor Skakapopulis: Yeah, I got something at the striptease. I help the girls dress and undress.
Michael James: Nice job.
Victor Skakapopulis: Twenty francs a week.
Michael James: Not very much.
Victor Skakapopulis: It's all I can afford.
Victor Skakapopulis: Yeah, I got something at the striptease. I help the girls dress and undress.
Michael James: Nice job.
Victor Skakapopulis: Twenty francs a week.
Michael James: Not very much.
Victor Skakapopulis: It's all I can afford.
Peter O'Toole
(as Michael James)
Michael James:
I'll be back tomorrow. If I'm not back tomorrow, send for the police. If they're not back tomorrow, send my clothes.
Peter O'Toole
(as Michael James)
Michael James:
I've had a lot of experience fondling, er, handling young women like you. And it's all got to stop.
Peter Sellers
(as Dr. Fritz Fassbender)
Michael James:
In Britain, we have a national therapy, we call it cricket. Unlike other sports, it doesn't involve anxieties or pressures. It's leisurely and lyrical. It's the song of willow on leather.
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: Is there any sex in it?
Michael James: Oh, no. This is a game for gentlemen, played by gentlemen.
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: It's sick, sick.
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: Is there any sex in it?
Michael James: Oh, no. This is a game for gentlemen, played by gentlemen.
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: It's sick, sick.
Peter O'Toole
(as Michael James)
Michael James:
Look, I know you'll think this is crazy, but, er, when the light hits me from a certain direction, I'm... handsome
[swigs from bottle]
[swigs from bottle]
Ursula Andress
(as Rita)
Peter O'Toole
(as Michael James)
Peter O'Toole
(as Michael James)
Liz Bien:
Would you excuse me for a minute? I'm going into the bathroom to take an overdose of sleeping pills.
Michael James: I like you. You're a nice stable girl.
Michael James: I like you. You're a nice stable girl.
Peter O'Toole
(as Michael James)
Liz Bien:
You're right. I must face my problems. I can't go through life being a semi-virgin.
Michael James: What, in the name of all that is gracious, is a semi-virgin?
Liz Bien: Here, I'm a virgin. In America, I'm not.
Michael James: What do they do? Stamp it on your passport?
Michael James: What, in the name of all that is gracious, is a semi-virgin?
Liz Bien: Here, I'm a virgin. In America, I'm not.
Michael James: What do they do? Stamp it on your passport?
Peter Sellers
(as Dr. Fritz Fassbender)
Victor Skakapopulis:
Do you have any salt?
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: Have I got any salt? I got a boat, I got kerosene, matches, firecrackers, two swords, and this flag. But, I ain't got no salt.
Dr. Fritz Fassbender: Have I got any salt? I got a boat, I got kerosene, matches, firecrackers, two swords, and this flag. But, I ain't got no salt.
