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Cary Grant

Cary Grant
(as George Kerby)

Cosmo Topper: My wife objects to drinking.
George Kerby: Then she shouldn't drink.
Cosmo Topper: She doesn't.
George Kerby: What's her objection?

Roland Young

Roland Young
(as Cosmo Topper)

Cosmo Topper: So I'm a ditherer? Well, I'm jolly well going to dither, then!

Constance Bennett

Constance Bennett
(as Marion Kerby)

Marion Kerby: [she and George Kerby are invisible to Topper] Toppy doesn't know us, Toppy doesn't know us!

Cary Grant

Cary Grant
(as George Kerby)

Marion Kerby: Hey, George, is this 10:30 in the morning?
George Kerby: No, this is Topper's bank.

Constance Bennett

Constance Bennett
(as Marion Kerby)

Marion Kerby: I'll be out before you can say Jack Robinson - only don't say it for a few minutes.


Constance Bennett

Constance Bennett
(as Marion Kerby)

Marion Kerby: Let's go have some dinner.
Cosmo Topper: Oh no, we cannot eat on an empty stomach!
Marion Kerby: Then we better have a few drinks first!

Cary Grant

Cary Grant
(as George Kerby)

Marion Kerby: Oh, George, I can see right through you.
George Kerby: Say, that's funny. I can see through you, too.
Marion Kerby: [seeing her body lying next to George's beside the car, which has just crashed] George, look. You know something George? I think we're dead.
George Kerby: I think you're right. Funny; I don't *feel* any different.

Constance Bennett

Constance Bennett
(as Marion Kerby)

Marion Kerby: Why don't you stop being a mummy for a few minutes and come to life? Of course, there's nothing wrong with being a mummy if you had any fun getting that way.
Cosmo Topper: But I... I didn't, you see.
Marion Kerby: No, I can tell that by the way you're staring at my knees.

Billie Burke

Billie Burke
(as Mrs. Clara Topper)

Mrs. Topper: Wilkins, after all these years, are you trying to be funny?

Arthur Lake

Arthur Lake
(as Elevator Boy)

Casey: [referring to Topper] Did you notice something funny about that guy?
Elevator Boy: That guy ain't funny, he ain't even human!

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