Dr. Ray Flemming: People don't always do the rational thing.
Lt. Columbo: Oh, they sure don't! You learn a lot about that in my line. Well, I guess you do in yours too.

Dr. Ray Flemming: They expect me to be on call at all hours.
Lt. Columbo: Same with me, Doctor.

Dr. Ray Flemming: Well, what is it? Tell me!
Lt. Columbo: Well, um, somebody broke in here and tried to kill her.
Dr. Ray Flemming: [Flemming feigns shock for a moment when the words register] "Tried" to kill her?
Lt. Columbo: That's right, Doctor. She's lucky she's still alive.
Dr. Ray Flemming: [feigning relief] She's still alive! Well, where is she now? Is she conscious? Has she been able to say anything?
Lt. Columbo: Well, I'm afraid not. She's been in a coma.
Dr. Ray Flemming: Well, what's her condition right now? Oh, come on, I must know the truth!
Lt. Columbo: It's not very good, Doctor. We only hope she comes to long enough to be able to talk to us.

Dr. Ray Flemming: You're an intelligent man, Columbo, but you hide it.

Lt. Columbo: [first words ever said by Columbo] Dr. Flemming?
Dr. Ray Flemming: Who are you?
Lt. Columbo: Lieutenant Columbo, police.

Lt. Columbo: [reaching in his pockets] Oh, uh, a few questions for my report, Doc.
[searching other pockets]
Lt. Columbo: Now, uh, you were in Mexico when this thing took place, and... uh... the dates there were... uh, gee, you don't have a pencil, do ya?
[Flemming hands him his pen]
Lt. Columbo: Thanks. You know, my wife, she gives me one every morning, but I just can't seem to hold onto it.

Lt. Columbo: I think I'm too suspicious. I don't trust people, that's my trouble.

Lt. Columbo: Lieutenant Columbo.
Burt Gordon: My name's Gordon. I'm with the District Attorney's Office.
Lt. Columbo: Yes sir, I know.
Burt Gordon: I appreciate it. Anything you can do for Dr. Flemming, he's a good friend of mine.
Lt. Columbo: I'll try.

Lt. Columbo: There must be something wrong with me. I seem to bother people, to make them nervous.

Lt. Columbo: There's just one more thing, sir!