Ben: You was down at the rapids just now, bare beam and buck naked?
Elizabeth: Well, I'm not like to take a bath with my clothes on, Mr. Rumson.
Ben: Are you trying to tell me that you was taking a *bath*?
Elizabeth: That's right. I was taking a bath.
Ben: In the middle of the night?
Elizabeth: Mr. Rumson, in a community of 400 men, would you rather I took my bath "bare beam and buck naked" in the middle of the day?

Elizabeth: Did you know that the Fenty's had an apple farm back in Pennsylvania?
Ben Rumson: Apple jack, huh?
Mr. Fenty: No, sir, we did not make apple jack!
Ben Rumson: Then, what did you grow the apples for?
Mr. Fenty: Mr. Rumson, do you think that everything that comes out of the earth should be used to make liquor?
Ben Rumson: Whenever possible, yes.

Elizabeth: I lived with a man who had two wives. Why can't a woman have two husbands?

Parson: [when some travelers have been newly rescued from hunger and cold] Rumson, I am entering your house to pray for the unfortunate victims.
Ben Rumson: Not tonight Parson, these folks have suffered enough. Now why don't you do that outside where God can hear you better, 'cause I'll be talking in here.

Horton: Mr. Rumson, I swore I wouldn't tell anyone. I hope that means except my father and mother.
Ben Rumson: That means especially your father and mother.
Horton: But I've never kept anything from them before.
Ben Rumson: Well, it's time you started. Because when you do, a whole new world opens up.

Mrs. Fenty: You should read the Bible, Mr. Rumson.
Ben Rumson: I have read the Bible, Mrs. Fenty.
Mrs. Fenty: Didn't that discourage you about drinking?
Ben Rumson: No, but it sure killed my appetite for readin'!

Horace Tabor: Is it your proposal, Mr. Rumson, that we knock out the stage driver, steal a coach, and kidnap six women?
Ben Rumson: Sounds better every time I hear it.

Horace Tabor: Wait a minute! You can't buy a woman for money.
Mad Jack Duncan: You just try and get one without it.

Mad Jack Duncan: All right.
[grabs Jacob Woodling by the beard]
Mad Jack Duncan: What about it Mormons?
Sarah Woodling: [whispering] Jacob. We need every penny, Jacob. And I can't bear another day of those martyred looks. There. There it is again!
Elizabeth: This isn't a martyred look, Sarah. This look is puuuure - hatred.
Jacob Woodling: Quiet! Brigham Young has twenty seven wives and he hasn't had half the trouble with them that I've had with the two of you!
Elizabeth: Then simplify your life, Jacob. Sell me.
Jacob Woodling: But Elizabeth: you don't know what you'll get.
Elizabeth: I know what I've had.

Mad Jack Duncan: I don't give a bloody damn how a man prays!
Mad Jack Duncan: There's enough room in hell for all of us!