Amelia:
Why were you sitting there like a stone image when those men were insulting me?
Harold: I was just waiting for one of 'em to say something to me.
--W.C. Fields (as Harold Bissonette) in It's a Gift
Harold: I was just waiting for one of 'em to say something to me.
--W.C. Fields (as Harold Bissonette) in It's a Gift
Mother:
Just use your own judgment.
Daughter: You tell me where to go.
Harold: [muttering] I'd like to tell you both where to go.
--W.C. Fields (as Harold Bissonette) in It's a Gift
Daughter: You tell me where to go.
Harold: [muttering] I'd like to tell you both where to go.
--W.C. Fields (as Harold Bissonette) in It's a Gift
[Harold ripped a pillow playing with the dog]
Amelia: Those were my mother's feathers!
Harold: Never knew your mother had feathers.
--W.C. Fields (as Harold Bissonette) in It's a Gift
Amelia: Those were my mother's feathers!
Harold: Never knew your mother had feathers.
--W.C. Fields (as Harold Bissonette) in It's a Gift
[to Charlie McCarthy]
Larson E. Whipsnade: I shall send over a couple of pet beavers to romp with you.
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
Larson E. Whipsnade: I shall send over a couple of pet beavers to romp with you.
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
[to Charlie McCarthy]
Larson E. Whipsnade: Quiet, you termit flophouse!
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
Larson E. Whipsnade: Quiet, you termit flophouse!
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
[to Charlie McCarthy]
Larson E. Whipsnade: You must come down with me - after the show - to the lumberyard... and ride piggyback on the buzzsaw.
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
Larson E. Whipsnade: You must come down with me - after the show - to the lumberyard... and ride piggyback on the buzzsaw.
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
Edgar Bergen: I have hopes of being your son-in-law.
Larson E. Whipsnade: With you, hope springs eternal.
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
Larson E. Whipsnade: With you, hope springs eternal.
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
Larson E. Whipsnade: As my dear old grandfather Litvak said (just before they swung the trap), he said "You can't cheat an honest man. Never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump."
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
Larson E. Whipsnade: I'm taking on the personality of a Mexican jumping bean. First the contortionist gets rheumatism. Then the sword-swallower gets tonsilitis. Hope nothing happens to that fan dancer... not 'til I get rid of this cold, anyway.
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
--W.C. Fields (as Larson E. Whipsnade) in You Can't Cheat an Honest Man
