Classic Movie Hub (CMH)


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Something for the Boys

Something for the Boys

Col. Jefferson Calhoun: It's still a grand old place, must be at least a hundred and twenty-five years old.
Harry Hart: Oh come now, Colonel, it couldn't get this old in a hundred and twenty-five years!


--Phil Silvers (as ) in Something for the Boys

Lucky Me

Lucky Me

Candy Williams: There's thirteen people in the audience.
Hap Schneider: This is no time to be superstitious. It's bad luck.


--Phil Silvers (as Hap Schneider) in Lucky Me

Roxie Hart

Roxie Hart

Babe: Well hush my big black mouth!


--Phil Silvers (as Babe) in Roxie Hart

40 Pounds of Trouble

40 Pounds of Trouble

Bernie Friedman: [at custody hearing] Well Judge, you can pass the buck up and down and back and forth, but when it gets to Bernie the butcher it don't go not further.
Judge: Is that what they call you? Bernie the butcher? Why?
Bernie Friedman: 37 years in the meat packing business, what're they gonna call me, Bernie the baker?


--Phil Silvers (as Bernie Friedman) in 40 Pounds of Trouble

Cover Girl

Cover Girl

Genius: [From the song "Who's Complaining?" which dealt with food rationing during World War Two] "Because of Axis trickery, my coffee now is chicory, and I can rarely purloin a sirloin... No complaining, through the campaigning. Who cares if the carrots are few? I'll feed myself on artichokes, until that Nazi party chokes, so long as they don't ration, my passion, for you!"


--Phil Silvers (as Genius) in Cover Girl


Cover Girl

Cover Girl

Genius: I don't feel good.
Rusty Parker: Oh, you don't? Where?
Genius: In the hall.


--Phil Silvers (as Genius) in Cover Girl

Cover Girl

Cover Girl

Genius: You know something? I love him too.
Danny McGuire: Yeah?
Genius: You know why?
Danny McGuire: Why?
Genius: Because he's dumber than me.
Danny McGuire: Dumber than I.
Genius: Okay. Then he's dumber than the both of us.
[Danny winces]


--Phil Silvers (as Genius) in Cover Girl

Cover Girl

Cover Girl

Genius: You probably know what you're doin', Mr. Coudair. But that was a pretty swell thing those kids had. Certainly glad I'm not the one that broke it up, I couldn't sleep nights.


--Phil Silvers (as Genius) in Cover Girl

Lucky Me

Lucky Me

Hap Schneider: [after Candy breaks a mirror] Hey, what's the matter with you? That's seven years bad luck.
Candy Williams: Let's make it fourteen.
[smashes another mirror]
Hap Schneider: Wanna try for twenty-one?
[Candy smashes a third mirror]


--Phil Silvers (as Hap Schneider) in Lucky Me

Lucky Me

Lucky Me

Hap Schneider: "Food By Anton". There's a nice bit. Here we are loaded with talent, and some hash hustler gets his name up in lights.


--Phil Silvers (as Hap Schneider) in Lucky Me

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