[Joe forces Kirsten to look in a mirror]
Joe Clay: I walked by Union Square Bar. I was going to go in. Then I saw myself - my reflection in the window - and I thought, "I wonder who that bum is?" And then I saw it was me. Now look at me. I'm a bum. Look at me! Look at you. You're a bum. Look at you. And look at us. Look at us. C'mon look at us! See? A couple of bums.
--Jack Lemmon (as Joe Clay) in Days of Wine and Roses
Joe Clay: I walked by Union Square Bar. I was going to go in. Then I saw myself - my reflection in the window - and I thought, "I wonder who that bum is?" And then I saw it was me. Now look at me. I'm a bum. Look at me! Look at you. You're a bum. Look at you. And look at us. Look at us. C'mon look at us! See? A couple of bums.
--Jack Lemmon (as Joe Clay) in Days of Wine and Roses
[Joe offers to reconcile with Kirsten - but only if she quits drinking]
Joe Clay: You remember how it really was? You and me and booze - a threesome. You and I were a couple of drunks on the sea of booze, and the boat sank. I got hold of something that kept me from going under, and I'm not going to let go of it. Not for you. Not for anyone. If you want to grab on, grab on. But there's just room for you and me - no threesome.
--Jack Lemmon (as Joe Clay) in Days of Wine and Roses
Joe Clay: You remember how it really was? You and me and booze - a threesome. You and I were a couple of drunks on the sea of booze, and the boat sank. I got hold of something that kept me from going under, and I'm not going to let go of it. Not for you. Not for anyone. If you want to grab on, grab on. But there's just room for you and me - no threesome.
--Jack Lemmon (as Joe Clay) in Days of Wine and Roses
[repeated line]
Harry Hinkle: You can fool all of the people some of the time, you can even fool some of the people all of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time!
--Jack Lemmon (as Harry Hinkle) in The Fortune Cookie
Harry Hinkle: You can fool all of the people some of the time, you can even fool some of the people all of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time!
--Jack Lemmon (as Harry Hinkle) in The Fortune Cookie
[repeated line]
Professor Fate: [shouts] Maaaax!
--Jack Lemmon (as Professor Fate / Crown Prince Frederick Hoepnick) in The Great Race
Professor Fate: [shouts] Maaaax!
--Jack Lemmon (as Professor Fate / Crown Prince Frederick Hoepnick) in The Great Race
[repeated line]
Professor Fate: Push the button, Max!
--Jack Lemmon (as Professor Fate / Crown Prince Frederick Hoepnick) in The Great Race
Professor Fate: Push the button, Max!
--Jack Lemmon (as Professor Fate / Crown Prince Frederick Hoepnick) in The Great Race
Daphne:
[in the berth, with the lady band members passing food around and a corkscrew's been brought] Girls, keep it down! You'll wake up the neighbours downstairs, now Josephine... WATCH THAT CORKSCREW!
--Jack Lemmon (as Jerry/Daphne) in Some Like It Hot
--Jack Lemmon (as Jerry/Daphne) in Some Like It Hot
Beinstock:
[as Daphne falls up the train steps] . Whoops-a-daisy!
[smacks his/her bottom]
Daphne: Fresh!
--Jack Lemmon (as Jerry/Daphne) in Some Like It Hot
Daphne: Fresh!
--Jack Lemmon (as Jerry/Daphne) in Some Like It Hot
Margie MacDougall:
[outside Baxter's apartment on Christmas Eve, after leaving a bar] Night like this, it sorta spooks you, walking into an empty apartment.
C.C. Baxter: I said I had no family; I didn't say I had an empty apartment.
--Jack Lemmon (as C.C. Baxter) in The Apartment
C.C. Baxter: I said I had no family; I didn't say I had an empty apartment.
--Jack Lemmon (as C.C. Baxter) in The Apartment
Sugar:
Believe it or not, Josephine predicted the whole thing.
Daphne: Yeah, this is one for Ripley.
--Jack Lemmon (as Jerry/Daphne) in Some Like It Hot
Daphne: Yeah, this is one for Ripley.
--Jack Lemmon (as Jerry/Daphne) in Some Like It Hot
