Bob Hope
(as Chester Babcock)
Harry Turner:
[hands Chester a hand mirror] Who's that?
Chester Babcock: I don't know, but gimme a stick and I'll kill it.
Chester Babcock: I don't know, but gimme a stick and I'll kill it.
Bob Hope
(as Chester Babcock)
Harry Turner:
An hour ago, she flipped over me. I don't dig it.
Chester Babcock: Well, that's understandable, an impressionable young thing falls for an elderly fellow. She probably thought you were a father figure.
Harry Turner: Father figure?
Chester Babcock: Yes, then she took another look and found out you had your father's figure.
Chester Babcock: Well, that's understandable, an impressionable young thing falls for an elderly fellow. She probably thought you were a father figure.
Harry Turner: Father figure?
Chester Babcock: Yes, then she took another look and found out you had your father's figure.
Bob Hope
(as Chester Babcock)
Harry Turner:
Chester, I give you my *solemn* word. *This* time it's not dangerous.
Chester Babcock: Not dangerous?
Harry Turner: No.
Chester Babcock: That's what 'cha said when you shot me out of a cannon, when you dropped me in a tank with an octopus. When you had me wrestle a gorilla. It's not dangerous! I'm not goin'. I'm through. I've had it. So forget it, *Charly*!
Chester Babcock: Not dangerous?
Harry Turner: No.
Chester Babcock: That's what 'cha said when you shot me out of a cannon, when you dropped me in a tank with an octopus. When you had me wrestle a gorilla. It's not dangerous! I'm not goin'. I'm through. I've had it. So forget it, *Charly*!
Bob Hope
(as Chester Babcock)
Diane:
There must be some sensible solution to this problem.
Harry Turner: Well, of course there is. Two fellas, one girl. Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, you come to my house.
Chester Babcock: Yeah. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays, my house.
Diane: What about Sunday?
Chester Babcock: Everbody rests.
Harry Turner: Well, of course there is. Two fellas, one girl. Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, you come to my house.
Chester Babcock: Yeah. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays, my house.
Diane: What about Sunday?
Chester Babcock: Everbody rests.
Bing Crosby
(as Harry Turner)
Chester Babcock:
[Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin arrive] The Italians have landed!
Harry Turner: The grape and the twig!
Harry Turner: The grape and the twig!
Bob Hope
(as Chester Babcock)
Bob Hope
(as Chester Babcock)
Chester Babcock:
Why do you suppose they're sending *us* up?
Harry Turner: They wanna find out if it's gonna be safe for the apes.
Chester Babcock: Oh.
Harry Turner: They wanna find out if it's gonna be safe for the apes.
Chester Babcock: Oh.
Robert Morley
(as Leader of the 3rd Echelon)
Leader of the 3rd Echelon:
I'll deal with humanity as I please and I'll do with humanity as I choose and I'll do it from the moon with my radio lunar bombs.
Bob Hope
(as Chester Babcock)
Leader of the 3rd Echelon:
In that rocket, we're about to send two animals around the moon and if we succeed, we shall next send two men. And from the moon, that point of impenetrable power, I shall go before the United Nations and demand that they accede to our total and absolute control.
Chester Babcock: [to Harry] I think he rolls his own.
Chester Babcock: [to Harry] I think he rolls his own.