Jack Lemmon
(as Jerry/Daphne)
Daphne:
[in the berth, with the lady band members passing food around and a corkscrew's been brought] Girls, keep it down! You'll wake up the neighbours downstairs, now Josephine... WATCH THAT CORKSCREW!
Pat O'Brien
(as Det. Mulligan)
Spats Colombo:
[when his speakeasy is raided] What's the rap this time?
Mulligan: Embalming people with coffee - 86 proof.
Mulligan: Embalming people with coffee - 86 proof.
Pat O'Brien
(as Det. Mulligan)
Spats Colombo:
Hello, copper. What brings you to Miami?
Mulligan: Heard you "opera lovers" were having a convention, so I thought I'd better be around in case anybody decided to sing.
Mulligan: Heard you "opera lovers" were having a convention, so I thought I'd better be around in case anybody decided to sing.
Joe E. Brown
(as Osgood Fielding III)
Osgood:
You know, I've always been *fascinated* by show business.
Daphne: Is that so?
Osgood: Yes. As a matter of fact it's cost my family quite a bit of money.
Daphne: Oh, you invest in shows?
Osgood: Showgirls. I've been married seven or eight times.
Daphne: You're not sure?
Osgood: Mama is keeping score.
Daphne: Is that so?
Osgood: Yes. As a matter of fact it's cost my family quite a bit of money.
Daphne: Oh, you invest in shows?
Osgood: Showgirls. I've been married seven or eight times.
Daphne: You're not sure?
Osgood: Mama is keeping score.
George Raft
(as Spats Colombo)
Nehemiah Persoff
(as Little Bonaparte)
Little Bonaparte:
[thick Italian accent] Thank you, fellow opera-lovers. It's been ten years since I elected myself president of dis organization... an' if I say so myself, you made duh right choice. Let's look at duh record: In duh lass fissel year we made a hundred an' twelve million dollars before taxes... only we ain't paying no taxes!
Jack Lemmon
(as Jerry/Daphne)
Pat O'Brien
(as Det. Mulligan)
Toothpick Charlie:
Look, chief, I better blow 'cause if Columbo sees me, it's gonna be "Goodbye Charlie!"
Mulligan: Goodbye, Charlie.
Mulligan: Goodbye, Charlie.
Harry Wilson
(as Spats' Henchman)
Bouncer:
[examining a golf bag] What's in here?
Spats' Henchman: My golf clubs. The putter, niblick, number three iron...
Bouncer: [pulling out a Tommy sub-machine gun] What's this?
Spats' Henchman: My mashie!
Spats' Henchman: My golf clubs. The putter, niblick, number three iron...
Bouncer: [pulling out a Tommy sub-machine gun] What's this?
Spats' Henchman: My mashie!
Dave Barry
(as Beinstock)
