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Tony Randall

Tony Randall
(as Jonathan Forbes)

Hotel clerk: There's no phone number, but I have a forwarding address.
Jonathan Forbes: 241 Stoneybrook Road.
Hotel clerk: Why yes sir.
Jonathan Forbes: [slams counter] And you let her go.
Hotel clerk: Well, it wasn't my place...
Jonathan Forbes: No, it's my place, and I helped him pack.

Doris Day

Doris Day
(as Jan Morrow)

Jan: I'm yours tonight. My darling possess me.

Doris Day

Doris Day
(as Jan Morrow)

Jan: Officer, arrest this man - he's taking me up to his apartment!

Doris Day

Doris Day
(as Jan Morrow)

Jan: Would you please get off this line!

Doris Day

Doris Day
(as Jan Morrow)

Brad Allen: [on the phone pretending to be Rex] Am I gonna see you tonight?
Jan: I'd love to Rex, but I already have a date.
Brad Allen: Who with?
Jan: A client. You don't know him. Jonathan Forbes.
Brad Allen: Of course, you're not the kind of girl who would break a date.
Jan: No I'm not.
Brad Allen: And I ain't the kinda guy who'd ask you to.
Jan: I know you're not.
Brad Allen: I'll pick you up at 8.
Jan: I'll be ready.


Doris Day

Doris Day
(as Jan Morrow)

Brad Allen: Are you getting out of that bed, or am I coming in after you?
Jan: You wouldn't dare!

Rock Hudson

Rock Hudson
(as Brad Allen)

Brad Allen: Look, I don't know what's bothering you, but don't take your bedroom problems out on me.
Jan: I have no bedroom problems. There's nothing in my bedroom that bothers me.
Brad Allen: Oh-h-h-h. That's too bad.

Rock Hudson

Rock Hudson
(as Brad Allen)

Brad Allen: Why don't you take her over for the rest of the evening?
Jonathan Forbes: Me?
Brad Allen: Yeah! Take her dancing maybe. She's dying to learn how to dance.
Jonathan Forbes: Wait wait. She doesn't know how to dance?
Brad Allen: Well naturally, she doesn't get out of the house very often.
Jonathan Forbes: What do you mean, "naturally"?
Brad Allen: Jonathan, believe me, you and Moose - I mean Miss Taggett will get along...

Tony Randall

Tony Randall
(as Jonathan Forbes)

Jonathan Forbes: Brad, she is the sweetest, she is the loveliest, she is the most talented woman I have ever met.
Brad Allen: That's what you said when you married that stripper.
Jonathan Forbes: She wasn't a stripper. She was an exotic dancer... with trained doves.

Tony Randall

Tony Randall
(as Jonathan Forbes)

Jonathan Forbes: Owww!
Brad Allen: What?
Jonathan Forbes: That chair. It just bit me.

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