Donald J. Penney, SIC man: Sometimes I suspect that you forget you're a member of Secret Intelligence Command. You're a SIC man.


--Fred Clark (as ) in Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine

Dwight Babcock: [Angrily] I am going to turn this kid into a decent, God-fearing Christian if I have to break every bone in his body!


--Fred Clark (as Dwight Babcock) in Auntie Mame

Dwight Babcock: For nine years, Mame Dennis Burnside, I have done everything in my power to protect this boy from your idiotic, cockeyed nincompoopery.


--Fred Clark (as Dwight Babcock) in Auntie Mame

Oliver Stone: Waiter! Bottle of ginger ale for Mr. Flagg!
Waiter: [disappointed that it's not champagne] Bottle of ginger ale for Mr. Flagg.
Oliver Stone: Domestic!


--Fred Clark (as ) in Living It Up

Tower Guard: [after taking LSD] Hey. Hey, you look like a flower.
Tower Guard: That's funny. I feel like a flower!


--Fred Clark (as Tower Guard) in Skidoo

Tower Guard: [referring to a hot-air balloon] It's a great, big, beautiful blob of nothing!
Tower Guard: Yeah!
Tower Guard: It wants me. It wants me. It loves me... but why is it going away?


--Fred Clark (as Tower Guard) in Skidoo

Tower Guard: I see the Green Bay Packers... and they're all naked!


--Fred Clark (as Tower Guard) in Skidoo

Betty Schaefer: Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Gillis, but I just didn't think it was any good. I found it flat and trite.
Joe Gillis: Exactly what kind of material do you recommend? James Joyce? Dostoyevsky?
Betty Schaefer: I just think that pictures should say a little something.
Joe Gillis: Oh, one of the message kids. Just a story won't do. You'd have turned down Gone With the Wind.
Sheldrake: No, that was me. I said, "Who wants to see a Civil War picture?"


--Fred Clark (as Sheldrake) in Sunset Boulevard

Wally Cook: Oh, come on, Oliver, where's your sense of humor?
Oliver Stone: [after she laughs] You were going to marry him. He would have done to you what he did to the paper.
[she stops laughing]
Wally Cook: [angrily] Why that two-timing little fraud!
Oliver Stone: Where's YOUR sense of humor?


--Fred Clark (as ) in Living It Up